So like I've just had oral surgery. I was doing okay until it was time to change the gauze for the first time, and OMG THERE'S SO MUCH BLOOD. And it doesn't feel so great either, but I can't take any ibuprofen until the bleeding stops. Dammit.

So. Even though I've had an interesting week and have even been to the cinema and therefore could review a film, I'M NOT GOING TO. NO. I WON'T. I'm just going to sit here and bleed, and then bleed some more.

Meanwhile, this hamster cracks me up.

In which V posts a couple of videos that are way better than the effing Housemartins, who have to be the lamest band of all time.

Trivia: one of the Housemartins grew up to become Fatboy Slim. THE MIND BOGGLES, OMG.

But I digress. M has been obsessed with a Kaiser Chiefs song lately. This has been the foundation of several conversations, most of which revolve around the premise that the Kaiser Chiefs song is reminiscent of this:


Having watched this video clip, I begin to think the resemblance is mainly in M's head.

But more to the point, Lily Allen has done a cover of the song, and I maybe like it better than the original. Also it has a nifty video wherein Lily Allen is ripping off Jessica Rabbit, which just proves the girl has style.


It's not actually Lily Allen's cover. It's some person called Mark Ronson. I've never heard of Mark Ronson. I'm not sure what he actually does, as Lily Allen is doing all the vocals. I digress. Enjoy.

V.'s post on religion and pop music reminded me of this little treat, posted here especially for V's delectation.
Bring on the inexplicable video of 80's a capella...

I'm borrowing this from my friend Lisa's journal. It's late, but I'm not quite ready to go to sleep, so mainly I'm doing this to kill time. It's something of a challenge, because I don't like to put a lot of very personal information about myself online. So I have to think of ten things about myself that don't really say much about myself, but that say enough to be interesting.

Ten Things You Probably Don't Know About Me

1. When I was seven years old, I had the high score on the Gauntlet game at this convenience store down the street from my house. I don't like to brag, but I'll brag about this. I was freakin' seven. I kept that high score for the entire summer. Fun fact: I always played Blue Wizard.

2. The first CD I ever owned was Depeche Mode's Violator.

3. When I was in elementary school, someone had written YOU IS UGLY on one of the bathroom walls in black marker. It was there for years. One day, I got a red marker and corrected their grammar. This is the only time I have ever vandalized anything.

4. The first concert I ever went to was The Bangles. I was 13.

5. There's a scene in Twin Peaks (the TV series, not the film) where the one-armed shoe salesman is beaten up by Bob in a bathroom stall. I saw this when I was 14 or 15, and have been afraid of public bathrooms ever since. I don't scare easily, but dammit Bob is creepy.

6. When I was in high school, I lost my class ring while I was cleaning my room. I called a phone psychic and she told me exactly where to find it. True story.

7. When I wear high-heeled shoes, I feel like a poser.

8. I used to be fluent in German. At one point in my life, I even thought in German more often than I thought in English. It's been about 10 years since I spoke it regularly, and now I can't remember most of it. I find it easier to read German now than to speak it. This makes me sad. I should take a refresher course or something.

9. I saw Taylor Hicks in the Memphis airport once. He had to wait for his luggage like everyone else.

10. I was in a play once, and in one scene I had to eat an apricot. I had never eaten an apricot before, and even in the dress rehearsals I just mimed eating one. On opening night, I had to eat a real one. Turns out I'm allergic to apricots, and my lips and tongue swelled up. This was possibly the most mortifying thing to ever happen to me in public.

Yeah, I know this daily dharma thing has hardly been daily. Or monthly, even. We all know I'm not a hardcore blogger. But sometimes I do feel like making some kind of positive difference in the world.

Anyway, here's a song called "Change Your Mind" by Sister Hazel. I don't know what Sister Hazel's personal beliefs are, but as a Buddhist myself I find the message of this song to be overwhelmingly Buddhist. If you're not a Buddhist (and I don't think any of my readers are, and that's fine by me) I think you can still get something out of it - it's just a great message.

This kind of got me thinking - there are tons of Christian Contemporary bands out there, but how come nobody's putting out popular music from the POV of Eastern Philosophy? I'd listen to it. But maybe I'm weird.

Anyway, yeah. Enjoy the song. I don't think there's an official video for it. This seems to have clips from some TV show I've never seen. Not sure what it is, but I really like that blond girl's hair. All the other clips on YouTube were live and had crappy sound quality. I digress. I really hope y'all like it - I listen to this song whenever I'm having a bad day, and it reminds me where my perspective needs to be. If you want to be somebody else, change your mind :)

Alternatively, proof that there absolutely is NOT a god. You decide!

Someone at MSN thought it would be a good idea to give the Coreys their own advice column. Y'all remember the Coreys. Y'all loved the Coreys, right? RIGHT?

I always thought the Coreys were awesome. Granted, I also think Breakin' is awesome, and even more so Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo. In the interest of full disclosure, I feel obligated to admit that I was also always very fond of the musical stylings of Exposé (see video below).


If you're feeling masochistic, you can see the Kids Incorporated cover of that song here. I, um, might also have liked Kids Incorporated a lot back in the day.

But it's not like I'm a loser or anything. These things are all prime examples of our rich cultural heritage and stuff. And more to the point, you can get advice from the Coreys. This is stellar news, and I had to share it with y'all, because it would be a crime to let you miss out.

Remember, when you eat you're just a vacuum with nipples.

In which V. has been to the cinema and was amazed by a new experience.

So I saw Hostel 2 today. I decided to go to the cinema closer to my house, what with gas costing $3 a gallon. I used to work at this cinema when I was in school, and for this reason I usually try to avoid it. But in these crazy times of insane fuel pricing, we do what we must.

So in the past week, they're refitted this cinema with digital projectors. No more old-school projectors, no sir. It's all digital. I've been hearing about this technology for a while, but having been a film student was mostly opposed to it. IMO part of the reason for seeing films in the cinema as opposed to at home on television is for the aesthetic experience of it. Yes, film flickers. Get over it. I like that.

Anyway, I don't exactly live in Hicksville, but I don't live in a major metropolitan area either, so I didn't really expect to be seeing anything digital in the local cinemas. But I arrive at Ye Olde Carmike this afternoon and there you go. It's all digital. I was aghast. DIGITAL? WTF. THIS IS A TRAVESTY.

But then I actually saw it with my own two eyes, and it is pretty amazing. The picture quality is a whole new world of sharpness. Sharpness and clarity, that's what I'm saying people. Between the previews and the actual film, they showed a little information segment about The Benefits Of Digital Projection, which made the case that whether it's the first time or the 100th time a film is shown, picture quality will never degrade. It can't get scratched or dirty or otherwise damaged. Which, I mean, that's a good thing.

All that said, I still don't think I'd want to see a digital projection of a classic film. Something like Citizen Kane, I think deserves that old-school flickering light aesthetic. But I think it's the perfect way to show stuff like, for example, Transformers.

Moving on, how about I actually review the film, eh?

Hostel 2 was just like Hostel 1 except this time the protagonists were girls instead of boys. The girls were also more sympathetic and likable than the boys were, so you feel worse about it when they start getting torture-killed. The people doing the torture-killing were maybe slightly more depraved than the last time around, too. But then they'd sort of have to be, wouldn't they? Otherwise why bother making a sequel. Oh, and there's a twist at the end that I didn't completely see coming, but wasn't too surprised by either. So yeah, I recommend. Unless you don't like ultraviolence. Yeah.

Stolen from someone's MySpace. I'm just waiting for the next episode of Hauntings to come on. Yeah, I know. I need a hobby.

SUPPOSEDLY if you've seen over 85 movies, you have no life. Mark the ones you've seen. There are 239 movies on this list.

(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
( ) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
(x) Starsky and Hutch
(x) Neverending Story
( ) Blazing Saddles
(x) Airplane

Total : 7

(x) The Princess Bride
( ) Anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgundy
(x) Napoleon Dynamite
(x) Labyrinth
(x) Saw
(x) Saw II
(x) White Noise
( ) White Oleander
(x) 50 First Dates
(x) The Princess Diaries
(x) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement

Total all together: 16

(x) Scream
(x) Scream 2
(x) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
(x) Scary Movie 2
(x) Scary Movie 3
(x) Scary Movie 4
(x) American Pie
(x) American Pie 2
(x) American Wedding
( ) American Pie Band Camp
( ) American Pie Naked Mile

Total all together: 26

(x) Harry Potter 1
(x) Harry Potter 2
(x) Harry Potter 3
(x) Harry Potter 4
(x) Resident Evil 1
(x) Resident Evil 2
(x) The Wedding Singer
(x) Little Black Book
(x) The Village
(x) Lilo & Stitch

Total all together: 36

(x) Finding Nemo
(x) Finding Neverland
(x) Signs
(x) The Grinch
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
( ) White Chicks
(x) Butterfly Effect
(x) 13 Going on 30
(x) I Robot
( ) Robots

Total all together: 45

(x) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
( ) Universal Soldier
(x) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(x) Along Came Polly
(x) Deep Impact
( ) KingPin
(x) Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
(x) Meet the Fockers
( ) Eight Crazy Nights
(x) Joe Dirt
(x) King Kong

Total all together: 54

(x) A Cinderella Story
( ) The Terminal
(x) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
(x) Final Destination
(x) Final Destination 2
(x) Final Destination 3
(x) Halloween
(x) The Ring
(x) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving Christmas
(x) Flubber

Total all together: 64

(x) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
(x) Practical Magic
( ) Chicago
(x) Ghost Ship
(x) From Hell
(x) Hellboy
(x) Secret Window
( ) I Am Sam
(x) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards

Total all together: 71

(x) The Day After Tomorrow
(x) Child's Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
( ) Bride of Chucky
(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
(x) Just Married
(x) Gothika
(x) Nightmare on Elm Street
(x) Sixteen Candles
( ) Remember the Titans
( ) Coach Carter
( ) The Longest Yard [the one with nelly in it]
( ) Gridiron Gang
(x) The Grudge
(x) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask

Total all together: 81

(x) Bad Boys
(x) Bad Boys 2
(x) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Sleven
( ) Ocean's Eleven
( ) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity
(x) Bourne Supremecy
( ) Lone Star
(x) Bedazzled
(x) Predator I
(x) Predator II
(x) The Fog
(x) Ice Age
( ) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
( ) Curious George

Total all together:91

(x) Independence Day
(x) Cujo
( ) A Bronx Tale
(x) Darkness Falls
(x) Christine
(x) ET
(x) Children of the Corn
(x) My Bosses Daughter
(x) Maid in Manhattan
(x) War of the Worlds
( ) Rush Hour
( ) Rush Hour 2

Total all together: 100

(x) Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th street
( ) Old School
( ) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
( ) Krippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
(x) Boogeyman
(x) The 40-year-old-virgin

Total all together: 105

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
(x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
(x) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

Total all together: 111

(x) BASEketball
(x) Hostel
( ) Waiting for Guffman
(x) House of 1000 Corpses
(x) Devils Rejects
( ) Elf
(x) Highlander
(x) Mothman Prophecies
(x) american History X
( ) Three

Total all together: 117

(x) The Jackal
( ) Kung Fu Hustle
(x) Full Metal Jacket
(x) Shaolin Soccer
(x) Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic
(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(x) Willard

Total all together : 125

(x) High Tension
( ) Club Dread
(x) Hulk
(x) Dawn Of the dead
(x) Hook
(x) Chronicle Of Narnia The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
(x) 28 days Later
(x) Orgazmo
(x) Phantasm
(x) Waterworld

total all together: 134

(x) Kill Bill vol 1
( ) Kill Bill vol 2
(x) Mortal Kombat
(x) Wolf Creek
(x) Kingdom of Heaven
(x) The Hills Have Eyes
(x) The Hills Have Eyes 2
(x) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
(x) The Last House on the Left
(x) Re-Animator
(x) Army of Darkness

Total all together : 144

(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
(x) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars: A New Hope
(x) Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back
(x) Star Wars: Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks the caravan of courage
( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor

Total all together: 150

(x) The Matrix
(x) The Matrix Reloaded
(x) The Matrix Revolutions
(x) Animatrix
(x) Evil Dead
(x) Evil Dead 2
( ) Team America: World Police
(x) Silence of the Lambs
(x) Hannibal
(x) Red Dragon
(x) Anger Management

Total: 160

Well. According to someone, I don't have a life. I'm pretty sure the sentiment would be returned. And Hauntings started, like, five minutes ago. Dammit.

I have no idea who Brenda Dickson is, but her herpes is back.

All 'contestants' on this year's The Apprentice are shambolic idiots, but check out this moment from their task to sell products on one of those live TV shopping channels. It's kept me laughing all week...