In which I am obligated to fill out this tedious thingy, which seems to be oriented towards married people with kids.

A- Available or Single? Uh. Shouldn't this say something like "Available or Taken"? Because 'available' and 'single' mean the same thing, and that doesn't leave one with much choice. In any case, I am neither available nor single.
B- Best Friend. Codename M.
C- Cake or Pie. Cheesecake.
D- Drink of Choice. Iced Tea.
E- Essential Item. Grenade launcher.
F- Favorite Color. Blue. Does anyone really care about this?
G- Gummi Bears or Worms. I'll pass, thanks.
H- Hometown. You're not supposed to give this kind of information on the Interweb, duh. I'll tell you my home state, though : South Carolina.
I- Indulgence. Misanthropy.
J- January or February. Neither. Too cold.
K- Kids. No thanks, I'm a vegetarian.
L- Life is incomplete without… I am so not in the mood for philosophy right now.
M- Marriage Date. To be determined.
N- Number of Siblings? Zero is the number of siblings that I have.
O- Oranges or Apples? Oranges and lemons, say the bells of St. Clements.
P- Phobias/Fears. Crowds, falling.
Q- Favorite Quote. "It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." - The Little Prince.
R- Reasons to smile. Oh, FFS.
S- Season. Spring/Summer.
T- Tag Three. Y'all know I don't like to push these things on people. If you want to fill this out, do it. If not, don't.
U- Unknown Fact About Me. If it's unknown, it's not likely to be something I'd post on the internet, now is it?
V – Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals. I'm a vegetarian who resents the implication that vegetarians think that meat eaters are oppressors of animals. Stop fucking stereotyping people. What you eat is a matter of choice and personal ethics, and is none of my business.
W- Worst Habit. Attempting to kill people using the power of my mind.
X – X-rays or Ultrasounds. To what end? This is dumb.
Y- Your Favorite Foods. Broccoli, Tofishy, Chocolate.
Z- Zodiac. Was a good film.