Let's imagine for a moment that French lounge lizard extraordinaire Serge Gainsbourg masterminded a musical composition in which a brunette Brigitte Bardot skips around dressed like a go-go dancer and makes nonsensical sounds which are vaguely reminiscent of a squealing pig.

Let's just imagine it. Is it too intense? Too spooky? That's okay, it's only a daydream. Close your eyes and count to ten. Go to your happy place. There, there... you're back in the real world now. The scary hippie music can't hurt you.

Oh, wait. Yes it can. Click here to see a Quick Time video clip of the above-described madness. It's incredibly slow-loading, but well worth the wait. Click on it, make a nice cup of tea or something, and don't worry about making sense out of whatever the hell this is.

Did I mention Bardot is wearing lavender thermal underwear and a Batman cape? Cos she is...