In which Eli has put V. in a tight spot.

Bearing in mind that 90% of my leisure reading consists of comics and horror novels, I'll do my level best here.

You're stuck inside Fahrenheit 451, which book do you want to be?
WTF does this mean? What book, in general, would I like to be? What banned book? Taken literally, what book would I like be whilst I am meeting my unfortunate end in flames? What book would I like to become a part of?

That last option seems the most interesting. My first instinct would be Emma, as it's my favorite girly story, and one I never tire of. But last fall I saw this TV show in England called "Regency House" wherein they had some young people spend a month living as Regency young people actually would. The girls washed their hair in egg yolk. That, amongst other things, makes me think perhaps no.

Oooh, oooh. I maybe wouldn't mind living in The Great Gatsby, as long as I wasn't one of the principal characters whose lives got completely ruined. Yes, I think I would enjoy the Jazz Age.

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?
Hasn't everyone? My biggie is going to be John Constantine. Follow that with Mr. Darcy (I think he must make every woman swoon), and then maybe... um... hell, I dunno. The Dread Pirate Roberts? I'm just making this stuff up over here.

The last book you bought is:
Buy? People buy books? I get them from the library, usually. Or borrow them from like-minded friends. Technically the last book I actually personally paid money for was the frigging DaVinci Code, bought completely out of desperation for something to read during a ten hour flight. I thought it was complete crap. People seem to have built some sort of cult following around this book. People are dumbasses. It's fiction, geez. And completely mundane and pedestrian fiction, at that. Soon to be a major motion picture from Ron Howard. Not exactly quality, that Ron Howard.

The last book you read:
A very good informative & helpful book about anatomy drawing for comic book artists. I don't recall the exact title offhand, it was something like "Anatomy Drawing For Comic Book Artists".

If you're talking fiction, I read a book called Bethany's Sin by Robert McCammon. Horror novel. Lurid, entertaining.

What are you currently reading?
Not a damn thing at present. Disappointing, I know. I don't even know what I feel like reading next.

Five books you would take to a deserted island:
Perfume, by Patrick Suskind. It's my favorite book of all time. Very gruesome, shocking, appalling, all of that good stuff. It's about perfume, but not in a happy "smells like flowers" way. More like "a deranged psycho distills the essence of young virgins" kind of way.

Kafka's The Metamorphosis, And The Stranger by Camus. My second and third favorite books. I really really like existentialism. What are you gonna do about it?

Lolita. Nabokov. Fourth favorite book. Lurid. Dirty. Beautiful

The Shining, Stephen King. I'm seriously hard to scare. Films sometimes can creep me out. Books never do. This is the one exception. This book is some warped nightmarish fucked up shit. Scares the absolute hell out of me. Stephen King writes a lot of crap, that's for sure. But dude. The Shining. Dude.

Who are you going to pass this stick to (3 persons)? And Why?
What happens if I don't? Will it make Baby Jesus cry?

Am I done now? May I be excused?